Thoughts of Clarence

I'm back again, it's been a long time since I updated my blog. Well, here it is. May nagrereklamo kasi sakin kanina na kasabay ko sa jeep pauwi na hindi ko na daw inuupdate ang aking blog. Kilala mo na kung sino ka, I tweeted you also. For those na gusto akong i-follow sa twitter, just follow @clarencemaehere , I'll follow back po. Anyway, eto na... Daming nangyari for the past 2-3 months of my life, basta masasabi ko na I felt so much happiness during those months, actually hanggang ngayon pala, hopefully in the future ganito pa rin yung nararamdaman ko. I love everything that's happening around me. Walang regrets! Promise! I'm a better person na po. Say hello again to the active and productive me! I took again some responsibilities that I know I can handle, especially knowing that I am with the best people. Para kong nabuhayan ng dugo sa mga activities na ginagawa ko sa school. I've been very busy but I always make time for my studies, family and friends. ...

When will it all stop? When will it all end? May seem like easy questions, But right now, I need answers. It's all a big mess, I want it to stop. Keeps on giving me headaches, But the worst are the heartaches. When will I be at peace? When will I show my genuine smile? When will I be mended? Please tell me, I need to know right now. No more lies, No more alibis, No more only you, But just happy me. -Made this last month, but posted just now. Hope you like it :)

One look, Is all that it takes. One smile, makes my heart breaks. Wish you could be mine forever, Wish we stayed a bit longer. Now, decisions have been made, Made everything complicated. The feeling was always there, It never really left. You've been a big part of me, Best that I ever had. The promise that I will keep forever, That I will leave you never. I will always be here, Even though we're not together.

Why do I feel that we have this connection? I know this isn't just my intuition. But why do I feel this way? Can't find the reason why. I can't keep my eyes off you, I feel happy just to stare at you. You always give me a reason to smile, All my worries and pain you take away. You light up my world of darkness, You lift me from the shadows of loneliness. You gave me strength to push through, You stayed by me through all these years. I know I can't reach you for now, Someday, I know I will. I will wait forever, Even if it takes all my life.

I'm a person of many faces, well not literally. I could be a drama queen, a clown in the group, a girl who gets into fights, a sweet and caring girl, and more. I'm not that pretty, fair, and tall. I'm just a simple girl who doesn't like to wear heavy make up, not even foundation, just the simple powder and lipstick will do. I sometimes wonder those people who wears heavy make-up for no special occasion, some just to post a picture in Facebook, Twitter, Instagram and etc. Maybe they want to hide something, or maybe they want to impress somebody. But if we all come to our senses, why do all these things for somebody else. I do believe that beauty comes from within, and so as some people out there. I also have my share of insecurities. Sometimes when I walk around, I see girls who have things that I don't possess, who looks like princesses without even trying hard. I can't help but wonder when will my moment come. Then I told myself, what if there are also ...

Nakakatuwa at napapadalas ang pagblog ko this past few days, siguro dahil minsan wala lang talaga kong mapagsabihan ng mga bagay bagay na nasa isip ko. Anyway, ambigat talaga ng pakiramdam ko every na nasa school ako. This is not someting scary pero ambigat emotionally. Due to recent events in my life, parang gusto kong lumayo muna sa mundo. Yung pumunta sa isang happy place at magstay dun ng matagal. Ngayon lang nangyari kasi yung grabe, before naman na experience ko na yung typical na ganito pero this time is different. Yung tipong every place and everything i see nakakapag paalala lang sa lahat. Sabi nila libangin ang sarili, pero pano mo naman lilibangin ang sarili mo??? Helloooooo.....hindi madaling makahanap ng ganun noh. Kung pwede nga lang na matulog na din muna ng mahabang panahon, gagawin na kesa naman gising ka at hirap sa kalagayan. Mahirap talaga pag nasasanay ka sa mga bagay bagay. Ang hirap ibalik yung buhay mo nung hindi pa nangyari ang lahat. Di mo malaman a...

Ewan ko ba ah, this has nothing to do with me but with my friends' situation. I'm not an expert of love, or even a love guru, pero alam ko naman pag hindi na tama yung ginagawa ng guy. I won't name my friends' name pero I'll share a little bit about them. I have one friend na nasa long distance relationship  Personally, di ako fan ng mga ganoon, kasi based sa observations ko at sa mga naririnig ko, siguro mga 5% lang ng lahat ng LDR ang successful, 95% ang hindi successful. Syempre isipin din naman na hindi lang love ang kailangan ng isang relationship, marami pa yang components. Parang car na hindi lang naman gas ang kailangan para gumana ng maayos sa loob ng mahabang panahon. Ayun, nalulungkot lang ako sa tuwing lalapit sya sakin at sasabihin nya ang problema nya dun sa guy. Di ko naman alam ang sasabihin ko kasi ayoko nga ng LDR dba. Although naexperience ko na yan, at nabilang yun sa 95% na tinutukoy ko kanina. Mahirap din kasi magtiwala ng sobra lalo na ...

I guess it's this time again, When my heart can't bear the pain. I'm on my own again, Can someone please lend a hand? I want to forget everything, Everything that reminds me of us. I want to erase all the memories, I want to stop all the crying nights. I wish to be in deep slumber, Sleep in a soft bed forever. Never to wake up again, Never to be hurt again. I want to live a new chapter of my life, Where heartaches are nowhere to be found. A happy and regret-free person, I know I can be one. I'm so tired of all these, I know time is all I need. Someday, I'll just laugh this out, But now, I just have to face everything, Even though it hurts so much.

Looking at these pictures of yesterday, Put a smile on my face. Seeing how happy we were, Makes me want to jump into memories. I'm very thankful that you're still here, Keeping your promise until forever. That you'll leave me never, And stay with me as we grew older. I never stopped loving you, Even if some days were blue. I treasure every moment we've spent together, Moments that made our love stronger. -Clarence Mae Cabrera I love you so much! :)

Sa tuwing ika'y nariyan, Mundo ko'y di malaman. Bakit ganito ang nararamdaman? Lubos akong naguguluhan. Sulyap ng iyong mga mata, Kakaibang ligaya ang nadarama. Tinig mong nakakahalina, Sa puso ko'y ikaw ang tanging pag-asa. Kung pwede lang sana, Pagbigyan mo ako sinta. Ipakita kung sino ang tunay na ako, Buksan ang puso sa isang tulad ko. Konting panahon lamang ang hihingin ko sayo, Para mapatunayan ko sa isang tulad mo, Na di kita iiwan, Mamahalin kita ng lubusan. -Clarence Mae Cabrera There are times na inspired po kaya nakakasulat ng mga ganyan. It's not that great but hope you liked it :)

Di ko talaga mainitndihan yung mga taong inayawan na nga pero sige lang sila dun sa gusto nila then pag may nalaman na something eh iiyak tapos maghahanap ng shoulder to cry on. Grabeeeee. Until now, di ko sila maintindihan. Here's the thing people, kung ayaw na sayo nung tao, wag mo nang ipagpilitan yung sarili mo sakanya. Wag mong ipakita sakanya na kaya mong gawin lahat para magustuhan ka niya ulit. It makes your image super low. Mafefeel nung taong yun na mas makapangyarihan siya sayo, na pwede ka nyang utuin or what. People naman, you are special in everything you are and in everything you do. Pwede ba, wag mong sayangin ang oras, pagod at luha mo sa mga taong ayaw na naman sayo. Wag mo din sana saktan ang sarili mo sa isang tao na hindi karapat-dapat sa mga binibigay mo. MOVE ON!! Nakakainis lang kasi diba, tapos manghihingi ng payo kung kani-kanino, sabay di naman pala susundin, haaaaaaay, stress kayo ah hahaha. I know the feeling of heartbreaks or mawalan na ng gu...

Can't seem to understand why some people keeps on asking about the bonuses that the Senate President gave. Tama ba ko, na may karapatan ang senate president na ibigay ang kahit anong halaga ng pera kung kanino nya gusto sa loob ng senado? Ang pagkakaintindi ko, galing sa sarili nyang pinaghirapan yung halaga ng pera na yun, na imbis pa na gastusin nya para sa kung ano man ang gusto nya, ay ibinigay nya na lang ito sa kanyang mga nasasakupan. Hindi ba may karapatan naman siya dun sa pera na yun, at wala namang pwedeng magawa ang mga nasasakupan niya sa kung pano niya ipapamigay yon. Kung iisipin naman diba, di na dapat umangal yung mga nabigyan, sa halip dapat pa silang magpasalamat. Hindi lahat ng tao nakakatanggap ng ganung halaga ng pera. Bakit masyadong sinisilip ito ng senado? Hindi ba dapat pag-usapan nalang nila kung ano pa yung mas mahahalagang dapat pagtuonan ng pansin sa ating bansa. Sila ang inaasahan ng mga mamamayan para gumawa ng mga batas na para sa kapakanan ...